


Love Potion No. 9

by Mnemosyne_Elegy



Category: Fairy Tail
Genre: Drama, F/M, Non-consensual mind-altering drugs, Romance, Slow Burn, aka love potions and all the mess that comes with them
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-08
Updated: 2019-05-08
Packaged: 2020-02-28 06:55:49
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 13,776
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18751297
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mnemosyne_Elegy/pseuds/Mnemosyne_Elegy
Summary: Juvia's latest foray into non-consensual mind-altering drugs goes horribly wrong, leaving a drugged Gray in "love" with Erza. Erza has no idea what to do with her love-struck friend and his furious suitor, but if she thinks things are bad now, she only has to wait for the effects to wear off. Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned...or like a man whose heart has been tampered with.





	Love Potion No. 9

**Author's Note:**

> I know, it's such a cliché trope. You know what they say: if you're writing a cliché, you'd better write a damn good cliché.  
> ...Unfortunately for y'all, romance is not my forte XP

The day Gray fell in love started off the same as any other for Erza. She went through her morning rituals without a second thought, her mind occupied with calculations of how much strawberry cake she could buy with the reward money from the job they had returned from the previous day. Lucy had spent the whole time talking about her rent, but she could be a little prosaic at times. Erza, on the other hand, knew that the real joys in life boiled down to strawberry cake.

She was still lost in visions of strawberries and cake when she drifted into the guild and pretended to listen to Lucy's newest rant about her landlady. Natsu's interest in food was a little more understandable, until Happy went off about fish again. Gross.

She wondered where Gray was. Not so much because she thought he would make the conversation any more interesting, but because she was half hoping he and Natsu would start a fight and she could sneak out in the chaos to visit the bakery.

But when Gray finally came striding through the door, something was off. Juvia was running along behind him, tugging at his arm.

"But Gray-sama!" she wailed. "Doesn't Gray-sama–?"

"Sorry, Juvia," he said, shaking her off. "There's something I need to do."

His walk was different as he made a beeline for the team's table. More…bouncy. His eyes were bright and his cheeks flushed, and his face split into a goofy grin.

Erza wondered if he was possessed.

"Erza." He stopped in front of her and took her hand. She was too flabbergasted to pull away. "I can't hold it in anymore. I have to tell you."

"Uh… What?"

His grin stretched even wider, lighting his face up. "I'm in love with you. Will you go out with me?"

Erza stared. Juvia stared. Everyone stared. All sound ceased.

"It's finally happened," Natsu whispered in awe. "The ice princess finally cracked. He just asked out  _Erza_. He's totally lost it!"

Shock temporarily forgotten, Erza rounded on him. "What is  _that_ supposed to mean?"

"Nothing! Nothing!"

"Gray-sama!" Juvia wailed. "That's not how it's supposed to work! It's supposed to be  _Juvia_!"

"Sorry," Gray said without looking back. "I already tried telling you that I wasn't interested. It's always been Erza."

Juvia nearly screamed in frustration. "But what went  _wrong_?" She glared at Erza. "New love rival."

Something was wrong. For one, Gray was not in love with Erza. And two, even if he  _was_ , he would never ask her out in front of the entire guild. He wasn't acting like himself, and there was something too bright and feverish about his eyes.

"Are you sick?" Erza asked bluntly, reaching out to feel his forehead and flushed cheeks. "You're burning up!"

"Only with love!" he said brightly, and that goofy grin was starting to look more and more unnatural. "I'm just lovesick!"

"Okay, no," said Lucy. "Gray can be a little corny sometimes, but he would rather die than say something that cheesy."

"Who are you and what have you done with Gray?" Happy demanded.

"Let's go on a date!" Gray said, undeterred.

Erza's mouth worked silently, the gears in her brain spinning uselessly. She had known Gray for a long time and had  _never_ seen him act like this before.

Her gaze caught on the distraught girl hovering behind him. Her eyes narrowed.

"Gray, would you mind waiting outside?"

"Huh?" His cheerfulness melted into something she could only describe as 'wounded puppy dog'. "You don't want to…?"

"Just… I'd like to speak to Juvia. I'll talk to you in a second. Wouldn't you rather continue this in private?"

Gray brightened instantly. "Of course! How considerate of you to work things out with her first. I'll be waiting for you!"

He snatched up her hand before she had time to react and planted a kiss on the back. Then he was off, whistling to himself as he practically sashayed out of the guild. Erza gaped after him, eyes wide and face burning. Someone catcalled from behind her.

" _You_." She turned on Juvia with blazing eyes. " _What have you done to Gray?_ "

"Juvia did not–"

"No way is this normal, and you've been acting shady."

Juvia hesitated and then deflated, crossing her arms and scowling at the floor. "Juvia bought another love potion. She made sure Gray-sama drank it and that she was the first one he'd see this morning. But he ran off and confessed to  _Erza-san_! Juvia does not understand! She was sure it would work this time."

Knowing how wary Gray was of his devotee, Erza wondered how Juvia had managed it this time.

…On second thought, she probably didn't want to know. She had the feeling that Gray really ought to invest in a better alarm system on his apartment.

"Seriously?" Lucy asked with a sigh. "Isn't it kind of unethical to drug him?"

"Love rival is just jealous," Juvia said haughtily. Lucy looked like she wanted to bang her head into the wall.

"What went wrong, though?" Happy wondered aloud. "Why is he in love with Erza instead of you?"

"He is  _not_ in love with Erza-san! And Juvia does not know. It should have been  _Juvia_ and–"

"Who cares why it didn't work?" Erza interrupted. "We have bigger problems. How do we fix it? Do you have an antidote?"

"…No. Juvia did not think she would need an antidote. It should wear off on its own eventually. Juvia bought more so that she could renew them, but not until she figures out what went wrong this time!"

"Not  _ever_." Erza narrowed her eyes, something about Gray's vulnerable state reawakening her overprotective big sister gene. "You will throw away whatever potions you still have, and you will not attempt to drug him again."

"But–"

"No. It's irresponsible and selfish of you to manipulate his feelings so crudely. I'm going to explain the situation to Gray.  _You_ are going to go back to whoever you got these potions from and find a cure."

Erza spun on her heel without another word and stormed out of the guild. Her bravado fled as soon as she stepped outside and Gray gave her that ridiculously lovesick smile again. She didn't know how to handle this at all.

"Erza!" he said, beaming at her. "Are you ready to go?"

"Actually…" She coughed awkwardly. "I need to talk to you for a second."

"Sure!"

She wasn't sure she'd heard Gray speak in so many exclamation points in all the years she'd known him.

"Gray… You don't really, you know, love me."

Gray laughed. "Of course I do!"

"No…you really don't. Juvia drugged you with a love potion and–"

"Don't be silly," he said with a fond smile. "I'm super careful of everything she gives me now. Anyway, I've been in love with you for a long time, so it's not like a sudden thing."

Here was an unexpected complication. Had the potion tampered with his memories as well? Or at least colored over them with a remembered pseudo-love? That would make things more difficult, if he didn't even remember his normal state of mind.

"What, since you first met me?" she asked resignedly, wondering how to counter this.

"Of course not!" Gray coughed out a laugh and grinned toothily. "I kind of hated you at first. But you grew on me."

Erza almost smiled at that very  _Gray_ assessment of their relationship, before remembering how bad this was. "Look, it's true, okay? We're going to find a way to fix this."

Gray's smile faded. "So…you don't like me, is what you're saying?"

"What? It's not–"

"You know, you could've just said that instead of going through all the effort to make up a story," he mumbled.

He looked away, but not before Erza caught a glimpse of the sudden soul-deep ache in his eyes, blotting out the inner shine that had been lighting them. He didn't seem angry or offended, just…sad.

… _Really_ sad.

"Oh, Gray. It's not…" Erza trailed off, not knowing what to say. "Don't… Don't look so down, alright? We can figure this out."

He glanced up at her from beneath his lashes, suddenly shy and uncertain. For some reason it reminded Erza of a vulnerable child, and it made this all the more difficult.

"Figure it out?" He nodded slowly. "Okay, let's do it right. You aren't sure yet, and that's okay. How about we start from the beginning? Let me invite you out on a few dates. No strings attached, and you can call it off at any time. But at least give me the chance to win you over?"

"I don't know…" Erza winced as the kicked-puppy look became even more pronounced on Gray's face. She had never realized he could look so pathetic. It was like a punch to the gut. "Oh, alright. We can hang out if you want."

His face lit up, back to that ridiculous smile that she could barely see Gray in. "Great! You won't regret it. Let's go out for lunch!"

What had Erza gotten herself into? This was horrible.

"Uh… Just a sec. Let me go… Yeah. I'll be right back."

She nearly ran back into the guild, and everyone ceased talking as they took in her panicked expression.

"Are you okay?" Lucy asked.

"No! He won't believe that he's drugged! The potion is making him think that he's been in love with me for a long time, so he won't believe that it just happened all of a sudden."

"…That could be a problem."

"You don't say. I'm going out with him. I agreed to let him try to win me over on some dates or whatever."

Lucy's eyebrows nearly climbed right up off her forehead. "Really?"

"I didn't know what else to do! You don't understand! He gave me this most pathetic look like I'd just shattered all his dreams and crushed his heart under my feet!"

"New love rival!" Juvia exploded. "Erza-san cannot go out with Gray-sama!"

" _You_  have no say in this, seeing as you're the one who started this mess."

"Juvia will chaperone to make sure new love rival does not take advantage of Gray-sama."

"Nothing is going to happen," Erza growled. "I'm just going to keep him happy and occupied. It'll give you guys some time to figure out how to fix this."

"But–"

"I swear, Juvia. Go find this antidote and find it fast. He's not himself and I don't know what to do with him."

"It's really freaky," Natsu volunteered.

Juvia drew herself up to her full height and glowered at Erza. "Juvia will find the cure so that Gray-sama is freed of Erza-san. But she will also be watching. And Erza-san would do well to remember that Gray-sama is under the effects of a potion and is  _not_ in love with her."

Erza leaned forward and met Juvia's gaze with steely eyes. "I know that. So what makes you think that if the potion had worked as intended, he would have been in love with  _you_?" Juvia's eyes widened, but Erza was already turning away. "Fix this," she said over her shoulder. "I'll bring Gray back later."

When she stepped outside, Gray hooked his arm around hers and dragged her off to a café. He was still feverish and overexcited and not himself. Unfailingly sweet, if more than a little clingy and corny, but definitely not himself.

Erza missed her Gray, and she wanted him back soon.

She sincerely hoped that his sudden bout of overly affectionate behavior wouldn't get back to Jellal. Or maybe it should, just to make him jealous. Then again, maybe he didn't care. It wasn't like he'd bothered dropping by in…forever. Stupid Jellal.

Funny, but she had once had a little bit of a crush on Gray too, a few years back. If she could have caught a glimpse into the future at this, it would have cured her of that instantly. Although maybe that wasn't being entirely fair, seeing as this wasn't anything close to how Gray would act if he had control over himself.

Gray insisted on paying for their meals, and even bought her strawberry cake. It tasted a little bit like ashes. There wasn't enough cake in the world to fix this.

Erza was hoping for good news when she and Gray finally headed back for the guild, but they were greeted by a circle of glum faces.

"Gray, would you mind getting me some water?" Erza asked.

"Of course!" He was already scrambling off to the bar, leaving Erza to shake her head after him.

She sat down with Juvia and the rest of the team. "What happened?"

"The guy didn't have an antidote," Natsu grumbled. "The ice princess is screwed."

Erza's heart sank. "Really?"

"Well, he gave us the names and addresses of some other potion makers…under duress," Lucy said. "We can hunt them down and see if they can help, but most are in different cities. It might be difficult to get their cooperation since most love potions aren't technically legal and that business is conducted on the black market, but we'll start traveling tomorrow."

"If all else fails, it should wear off on its own within one to two weeks," Happy added glumly.

Erza didn't know how to handle this for weeks. She couldn't even handle it for a  _day_.

"Juvia will find a cure!" Juvia gave Erza a nasty look. "She will not allow Gray-sama to be in love with new love rival for any longer than necessary."

"Good," Erza said shortly. "Is there anything I can do?"

Lucy gave her an apologetic smile. "I think he'll just follow you around like a lovesick puppy. He might get in the way, especially since he doesn't buy the whole potion thing. Maybe just…try to keep him happy as much as you can?"

Erza sighed, her eyes following Gray as he began bouncing back over with a glass of ice water in hand. Babysitter duty it was.

"It's kind of sad, isn't it?" Mira remarked, pausing behind Erza to watch.

"What?" Natsu asked.

"When's the last time you've seen him look so happy? And it's fake. It's too bad that it took a potion for him to be more open about his feelings, too."

Erza's eyes traced along Gray's goofy smile and fever-bright eyes. Yes, she thought that seemed rather sad.

* * *

Erza turned the corner and scanned the crowded street. She hadn't even realized there was some kind of festival today, but that was what Gray had insisted their next 'date' be.

The team and Juvia would be busy today going out to the different apothecaries and potion makers to look for something to cure Gray. If she could just survive today, then things could go back to normal.

She let her breath out in a sigh, wondering why they had decided to meet here instead of beforehand. The streets were filled to bursting with excited people and bright decorations, and the hubbub made her eyes want to cross.

"Erza!" Gray waved, and Erza sighed in relief as she worked her way over to him. "Good morning."

"Good morning. Are you alright?"

His cheeks were still flushed, but his eyes didn't have that same sparkle anymore and his mouth was pinched at the corners.

"Yeah." He smoothed out his expression and raised an eyebrow. "Are you going to be warm enough in that?"

Erza rolled her eyes and tugged her sweater closer against the chilly air. "It's not  _that_ cold."

Gray's face lit up, his eyes finally regaining a spark of excitement. "We're getting a cold snap tonight. It might even snow!"

"Snow would be nice."

"I'd love it. Anyway, there's some parade thing that's starting in an hour, but there are all sorts of vendors and booths set up if you want to take a look around first."

Erza was content to browse through all the trinkets and booths. It actually wasn't so bad, and she didn't realize why until it hit her that Gray was being rather quiet and not as loopy as the day before. There was no handholding or declarations of love or sudden bouts of corny love poetry. Maybe the effects of the potion were settling down. Gray wasn't quite himself, but at least he was closer.

"I don't know," he was saying as they turned away from another stall, "I think–"

He stopped abruptly and stumbled back a pace, eyes glassy as his arms flew out to the sides as if to steady himself. Erza grabbed one of his arms.

"Gray? Gray, are you alright?"

"Y-yeah…" He shook his head and regained his footing. "Sorry, I just got a little lightheaded for a second."

Erza's mouth curved into a frown as she studied him more critically. He was looking feverish and tired and ill.

"Should we sit down?"

"No, no. Look, the parade is starting. Let's go find a good spot!"

He took off in a hurry, dragging Erza behind him as he wove through the crowd. They found a spot near where the floats and acts were passing, and he kept his gaze fixed stubbornly on the performers. Erza watched him sidelong, but he wasn't going to admit to anything if he didn't want to.

So she brushed it off and cheered for the performers instead. The cold was starting to get to her by the time it was finally drawing to a close, but it wasn't like she could admit that to Gray.

"Not as good as Fantasia, but it was alright," she declared.

Gray snorted. "I don't think  _any_ festival has anything on Fantasia."

"Fair enough." Erza was interrupted by her stomach emitting a loud growl.

"Oh, are you hungry?" Gray winced and rubbed at his nose. "Sorry, I should have thought to get you lunch before the parade… You wanna grab something?"

"…Sure."

He smiled apologetically and pushed his way back through the crowd, Erza following close behind. They had just escaped the worst of the crush when he went rigid, wavered dangerously, and collapsed.

Erza dropped to her knees, frantically feeling for his pulse and kicking herself for not taking his earlier dizzy bout seriously. "Gray!"

He moaned and his eyes fluttered open halfway. "What happened?" he mumbled, blinking up at her blearily with dark, uncomprehending eyes.

"You just passed out." She cursed under her breath as she ran her hand over his face. "You're burning up! Let's get you home."

"I'm okay," he slurred, struggling valiantly to sit up.

"Uh-uh. How long have you been feeling ill?"

He hesitated and then deflated. "Dunno. Been feeling kind of weird the past couple days."

"Is it just the fever and dizziness?"

"Started that way. Woke up with a killer headache this morning, though."

"You  _idiot_. Why didn't you just  _say_ something?"

He sighed and let his eyes trace over the ground in lazy circles, looking for all the world like a miserable child. "We were going out, and I didn't want…"

"We could've just done it a different day. Come on, let's get you home." Erza pulled him to his feet, brushing off concerned spectators as she helped him stagger back down the street. He leaned on her heavily, his face tight with pain and his eyes screwed halfway shut. "It looks like the potion is making you sick. I hope that passes soon."

Gray sighed again, now looking unbearably tired on top of everything else. "The potion? Are you still going on about that?"

"Well, seeing as I know you got dosed…"

"One day I'm going to make you believe," he mumbled.

"That there's no potion?"

"That it's real."

Erza sighed and gave up. It had been worth a shot.

It was a slow and painful trek back to Gray's apartment, and he deteriorated rapidly now that he didn't have a stake in hiding it. He winced and half-buried his face in her neck, as if trying to shield his eyes from the light. His breath puffed in painful gasps against her neck, and she could feel his skin burning up as he staggered and swayed.

He finally managed to fumble around enough to let them into his apartment, and Erza helped him over to his bed. He collapsed and she yanked the covers out from beneath him to tuck him in.

"Can you leave the light off?" he wheezed weakly.

"Is the light making your headache worse?"

"Yeah. It's weird… I never really get headaches or dizzy spells or any of that."

Erza hummed noncommittally, having a good idea of why it was happening now. She fussed over him: fetching cool water and damp rags to lower his fever, searching for any useful-looking medications, getting ice water to leave on his bedside table.

"Thanks," he sighed. "You can go."

"That's alright. I'll stay."

"Seriously, I'll be okay. Go do something more fun."

Erza was afraid to leave in case things got worse. What if he had a  _really_ bad reaction to the potion? She didn't know what it was doing to him, and she needed to be here in case something went really wrong.

"I'll stay." She caught a glimpse of movement out the window and frowned. "Weird. I could've sworn I saw something out the window, but nothing's there."

"Probably Juvia," Gray mumbled, pulling the blanket up over his eyes. "Just close the curtains. I always close the curtains when I sleep now."

"That's…kind of creepy."

"Yeah, well. I can't get her to stop, so…"

Erza's mouth pressed into a disapproving line as she cast another look over the street and pulled the curtains shut. It had better not be Juvia out there—she was supposed to be finding an antidote.

"Do you want me to make you soup or something?" she asked.

"Nah, I'm actually kind of nauseous and not hungry. I'm just going to sleep. But you can eat anything in the kitchen, if you want."

"…Okay."

"I'm sorry for ruining our not-date," he mumbled quietly as she slipped out of the room.

Pausing in the doorway, she looked back and shook her head fondly. "Don't be silly. You didn't ruin anything. But just tell me next time so that we can get you home before you collapse in the middle of the street."

She left him to rest and raided his kitchen. After eating her fill, she wandered around his apartment and snooped like a bad friend. It was rude, but she was bored and was going to be stuck here all day to make sure he didn't die or whatever.

Eventually she got tired of poking through his drawers—it was, unfortunately, a rather small apartment—and quietly dragged a chair over by his bed. Gray was already asleep. He had pushed the blanket away from his face, possibly so that he could breathe, so she could see the way his features were tight and pained even in sleep. He shifted and moaned restlessly, the antithesis of peaceful sleep.

Erza sat and kept watch. Until she fell asleep. Which didn't take very long, as she was bored. So much for making sure he'd be alright.

She woke up sometime in the night. She yawned and stirred groggily, but paused and looked down at the blanket wrapped snugly about her.

Gray was curled up facing away from her now, his breathing deep and even instead of ragged. He was only under the sheets—the comforter was conspicuously missing.

"Dummy," Erza mumbled with a smile.

But it was warm and snuggly in the blanket and she was still drowsy, so she nestled back down and fell asleep again.

When she woke again, Gray was gone. She stared at the empty bed for a long moment and then cursed under her breath. Slithering out of the blanket and throwing it back onto the bed, she stretched out her cramping muscles and went to hunt for her missing friend.

"Good morning," Gray said when she walked into the kitchen. He held up a pan of eggs. "Hungry?"

She stared. "I didn't know you could cook."

He smiled sheepishly. "I can't, but I can at least make eggs and toast."

Erza obediently sat down at the table as Gray grabbed dishes and served her breakfast.

"You look better," she said, stabbing at her eggs and eyeing him. "How are you feeling?"

"Totally fine." He shook his head and crunched on a corner of his toast. "I don't get it. It's like it never even happened. Sorry you had to stay all night… You should have gone home."

"It's not a problem. I'm just glad you're okay."

"I'll make it up to you since the festival was a bust." He grinned. "Wanna go on a job?"

Erza wasn't sure she was willing to risk that yet. He might seem fine now, but what if the potion caught up to him again? She didn't want him to get himself hurt like that.

"Why don't we wait on that? Let's do something quieter today, until we're sure you aren't sick anymore."

"But I'm fine and–"

"What if you collapse again? We can go later, once we know you're fine."

Gray's lips tightened and he looked away. "Fine. But what?"

"The park, maybe?"

She could practically see him thinking  _'boring'_ , but at least he was polite enough not to say it.

"I guess," he said. "Maybe we could have a picnic or something?"

"Sounds like a plan," she said, even though she thought it was too cold to really be picnic weather. She studied his face carefully. "Are you still, you know…in love with me?"

He gave her a funny look. "You still don't believe me? Of course I am."

Well, it had been worth a shot. She had been hoping that maybe the potion was wearing off since Gray was acting a little more like himself, but maybe not.

"Well, let's stop by the guild first," she said. Maybe someone had had some luck with the antidote.

Gray was amenable to this, and his mood instantly brightened when they stepped outside into a thin dusting of white powder—the winter's first snow. It wasn't much, but Erza had to smile at the way it made Gray's face light up.

"I'll get Mira to help me make up a basket for the picnic," Gray said, heading directly for the kitchen once they were inside the guild.

Erza took advantage of his absence to slide in next to the team and beg them for any kind of good news.

"Sorry," Lucy said with a sigh. "It was a bust. Natsu, Happy, and I are going to hit a few more places soon, so we might be gone for a few days."

"At least he seems a little less weird today?" Happy offered.

Erza scowled. "Yeah, but he still thinks he's in love."

A shiver of foreboding tickled her spine and she turned to see Juvia behind her. The water mage's face was adorned with a fearsome glower, wrath raging behind her eyes.

" _Why did new love rival spend the night at Gray-sama's house?_ "

Natsu blinked stupidly. "Huh?"

"So it  _was_ you." Erza leveled Juvia with a flat, steely look. "I thought you were supposed to be looking for an antidote."

"Juvia was, but she also has to make sure that new love rival does not–"

"Enough. He had a bad reaction to the potion and passed out. I stayed to make sure there weren't any more complications to the potion that  _you_ drugged him with. Stop stalking us and do something useful. Like finding the cure to this damn potion."

Juvia's mouth snapped shut and something like guilt flickered over her face. Good. Maybe something was finally getting through to her.

"He passed out?" Lucy demanded. "Is he alright?"

Erza shrugged helplessly. "He seems fine today, but yesterday he had a headache and dizzy spells and a really high fever. But the effects of the potion seem to be settling down, at least. Maybe it's wearing off?"

"Doubt it," Natsu said glumly. "The potion dude said there's no way it would go less than a week. It was kind of funny at first, but he's really weird like this and I want him back to normal."

"Me too," Erza said fervently.

Gray appeared from the kitchen with a basket hooked on his elbow, Mira chattering gaily alongside him. He smiled shyly at Erza and waved.

"Ready?"

"Yeah." She sighed and stood, whispering, "Find it."

"We'll do our best," Lucy whispered back.

"Have fun!" Mira said, grinning at Gray and Erza. "And remember, no babies until at least the fifth date!"

Gray turned an impressive shade of red. "Mira!"

"Seriously?" Erza asked, pretending that her face didn't match her hair. "You know better."

Mira shrugged and winked. "Doesn't mean that you can't have some fun while it lasts!"

Erza shoved her way out of the guild, ignoring Juvia's furious spluttering. "She has some nerve."

"She's just messing with you," Gray muttered, falling into step beside her but focusing intently on the ground. "She seems all sweet and innocent nowadays, but I'm pretty sure she uses that as a cover sometimes. I think she still likes to be your rival every once in a while."

Erza almost smiled, before remembering that Mira ought to know better in this situation. Instead, she just mumbled noncommittally and followed Gray out to the park.

And it was extremely awkward. Gray wasn't head-over-heels crazy anymore, but now everything was catching up to him and he was shy and quiet and uncertain. And Erza didn't know what to say or do either in this impossible situation. It was kind of awful.

They wandered through the park, finding an intense fascination with the snowy trees so that they didn't have to look at each other as they attempted stilted conversation. At least lunch gave them something to do, since they couldn't seem to come up with anything to talk about.

Gray spread a blanket over the snow and pulled out all the food Mira had helped him make and pack, including thermoses of delicious hot chocolate that he had made himself. It was all rather sweet and thoughtful, but Erza missed being able to just talk to her friend normally.

She did feel a little bad, though, because he was looking rather downcast by the end of it, clearly realizing that things weren't going well but unable to overcome his sudden love-struck shyness. Poor kid. Erza hoped they got him back to normal soon.

Juvia and the team were gone by the time they got back to the guild—although she could have sworn she'd seen quick flashes of blue among the trees in the park, so it was very likely that Juvia was still hanging around somewhere. Erza wished they were here to commiserate with her, but it was good that they were looking for a solution.

They didn't return the next day either, which she didn't take as a good sign. It was another day of dealing with a Gray who was unbearably sweet but dreadfully awkward. When he suggested again that they go on a job the next day, Erza jumped on the opportunity. She was still a little concerned about possible side effects of the potion, but she hoped that getting Gray back into a more normal environment would snap him out of this weird phase.

…Not that she necessarily wanted him confident enough to start spouting off horrible love poetry again, but it would be nice if he could at least meet her eyes and talk to her.

She picked a job that didn't look too difficult—a store selling magical amulets and talismans a few cities over had gotten robbed by some amateur thieves that needed catching. She didn't want anything too dangerous, just in case.

The train ride over was still characterized by that quiet uncertainty, but Gray began crawling back out of his shell as they conducted their investigation. With his focus shifted off of Erza, he reverted back to his normal snarky self. He and Erza terrorized the town, turning everything upside down and questioning the shopkeepers and interrogating the citizens.

"You know," Gray said, chewing on his lip thoughtfully as they huddled behind the store to discuss their findings, "I think this might've been an inside job."

"I think so too," Erza agreed.

"No, but I think it's actually the shopkeepers. Did you hear how big their insurance payout was? I did some digging, and it looks like they insured those items only a few weeks ago. I bet they just hid them somewhere to claim the insurance money and are putting up a sham investigation to shift the blame onto some imaginary robbers."

"That's…actually smart."

"…Sure. Every once in a while, I manage to overcome my natural stupidity."

"That's not what I meant!" Erza protested. Gray gave her a mournful look and she winced. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean–"

"I'm wounded," Gray said with a dramatic sigh. "You've broken my heart."

She rolled her eyes. "Could you lay it on any thicker?"

He gave her a mischievous grin, his eyes twinkling merrily. "Yes, actually, but I doubt you'd like to see it."

"…Let's just make some plans on how to stake this place out."

Which was how they found themselves casing out the shop and then the house of the couple who owned it. When they were sure the suspects were out of the house, they quietly broke in and tiptoed around inside.

"Maybe a secret drawer or something?" Erza suggested when they came up empty on all the normal hiding places.

"Maybe."

Gray knocked lightly on the far wall and shook his head. As he began working his way down the wall methodically, Erza retreated to the other side of the room to check through the drawers over there again.

She stepped into the corner to look around the side of the dresser, and the wooden planks beneath her feet creaked. She rocked another step forward to peer at the frustratingly unremarkable piece of furniture.

And the floor beneath her gave way, sending her crashing down into a shallow cavity with a startled cry.

"Erza!" Gray abandoned his halfhearted search and rushed over. Erza found herself blinking dazedly at his knees until he crouched down. "Huh. You found it."

Something hard and cold was digging into her palm, and she looked down to find an amulet that had escaped the bag shoved into the corner of the hollow. "If you even  _think_ about making a weight joke…"

"Hey, hey, I was just going to say that they did a really bad job of making a hiding place if they made it so weak you'd fall right through."

"Uh-huh…" She pulled herself back to her feet, and Gray helped her out of the mess of broken floorboards. He bent down to heave up the heavy bag of 'stolen' merchandise, and Erza found herself blinking blankly at the corded muscles of his arms and back. "Where did your shirt go?"

He dropped the sack to the ground and looked down at himself. "Oh man, where did it go?"

Erza rolled her eyes but spotted his shirt balled up on the other side of the room and fetched it for him.

Cleanup was generally the least fun part of the job, but she was all too eager to confront the fraudsters and hand them over to the authorities so that she could get paid. There was a small hiccup since the people who should have been paying them were going to jail, but Erza figured it was okay to just quietly take what they were owed.

"Think of all the strawberry cake you could buy with that," Gray said.

Erza smiled dreamily. "Believe me, I am."

"How do you manage to eat that much cake, anyway? It seems like that's what your whole budget goes to."

" _I told you not to make any weight jokes_."

"W-what?" Gray took a hurried step back and waved his hands as if to placate her. "That's not–"

"And where did your shirt go— _again_?" Erza demanded, noticing a few passing ladies tittering behind their hands and giving him appreciative once-overs.

"What?" He looked down at his bare chest and groaned. "Oh, come on!"

"You can't even keep it on for twenty minutes?"

"I…guess not?" His flustered expression took on a wicked edge as he glanced sidelong at the passing women and then smirked at Erza. "Why? Getting a little jealous?"

"W-what?" she spluttered.

"Don't worry, I'm only interested in you," he said with a snicker.

Erza gaped at him, unsure of why her cheeks were burning so hot, but then lunged for him. " _I'm going to strangle you_."

Gray backpedaled, but she grabbed onto him and began unceremoniously strangling him to within an inch of his life.

"Uh… Erza? Gray?"

She froze and looked up to see Lucy standing a few feet away, Natsu and Happy by her side. She hadn't realized their quest had taken them here.

Following Lucy's stunned gaze, she turned back and suddenly realized how close she was to Gray, their faces almost touching. She jumped back.

"It's not what it looks like!"

Natsu scratched his head, perplexed. "You  _aren't_ trying to choke him to death?"

Erza blinked at him for a few seconds and then relaxed. "Maybe it  _is_ what it looks like."

Happy grinned. "Gray and Erza sitting in a tree, K-I-S-S-I-N–"

" _I will choke you to death, you mangy furball_."

Happy yelped and dived behind Natsu for protection. Gray coughed and rubbed at his throat, but apparently his brush with death hadn't made much of an impact on him.

"Hey, I didn't realize your job was out here. Sorry to interrupt your  _alone time_."

"Not so much alone," Natsu said with a shrug. "Lucy and Happy are here."

"I'm sure you've been really  _busy_."

"Yep," Natsu agreed blithely.

" _Gray_ ," Lucy warned.

Gray just grinned. "You guys have been running off on your own so much lately. Have you finally eloped? Because it's not nice to not invite the guild to your wedding."

"Wedding?" Natsu asked blankly.

"Oh, be quiet," Lucy grumbled, her face red.

Gray snorted. "Geez, you're so dense, flame brain."

" _What?_ " Natsu drew himself up to his full height, eyes blazing. "I'll show you who's weak!"

Gray face-palmed. "I said you were dumb and unobservant, not weak. But since you brought it up…"

"Bring it on, ice block!"

Erza rolled her eyes and whacked them both over the head as they aimed their first punches at each other. "Knock it off, you two. And Gray, put on your shirt already."

She snatched the discarded garment from the ground and shoved it at his chest.

"Ow," he grumbled, but obediently pulled it on. "Sorry," he added, having to make a strange coughing sound to cover up his laughter. "I'll try to be more considerate of your feelings next time."

" _Gray Fullbuster, I swear to God_."

"I'm done, I'm done!"

Lucy shook her head and looked between Gray and Erza. "Weirdly enough, you guys are kind of cute."

Gray frowned. "Thanks? I think?"

Erza's lips tightened. "Lucy…"

"I know, I know," Lucy said. "I'm just saying, I thought there was no way you'd ever work out, but I can kind of see it."

"Really?" asked Natsu. "I still think it's totally nuts. For one, the ice princess is a complete jerk, so who would want to date him? And you'd have to be totally crazy to date Erza."

"What is that supposed to mean?" Erza demanded.

"Uh… Nothing?"

"Gray, I need you to defend my honor."

Gray stared at her in disbelief. "Really?"

When she nodded firmly and glowered at Natsu, he grinned and pounced on his rival. The boys tussled violently, fists and magic flying, and she hoped there wasn't going to be too much collateral damage.

But Erza couldn't help but smile just a little as she watched them. As annoying as their fighting could be, it was good to see them back to being themselves and having a good time. In fact, it was good to see that Gray could interact normally with the team again, despite how screwed up his brain was.

She glanced to the side and found Lucy staring at her with an odd expression. "What?"

"Nothing." Lucy shook her head and turned her gaze back to the warring duo. "I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but… We followed up on nearly all of those leads, and we've come up empty. It looks like Juvia dosed him with something really potent, and there's a concern that trying to counteract the effects—especially since they seem to have twisted his memories about so thoroughly—might cause some permanent damage. I think we'll just have to wait it out until it wears off."

Bad news, indeed. On the bright side, Gray was much easier to handle than that first day. Now Erza would just have to keep things under control and make sure he didn't get hurt and survive Juvia's jealous rages until the potion finally wore off.

How hard could it be?

* * *

" _Juvia Lockser!_ " Erza thundered as she stormed into the guild.

Water dripped from her hair and soaked through her coat, leaving her shivering and furious. No way had several gallons of water  _just happened_ to have collected on the roof of the guild and fallen down the moment she walked underneath. Especially not when they'd been getting snow instead of rain.

She spotted the smug-faced culprit looking on in satisfaction. "I've had about enough of you! How dare you dump all that water on me?"

"Juvia does not know what–"

"Don't even try it. You've been harassing me for  _days_ , and I'm sick of it!"

The past several days had been characterized by much better relations with Gray, but this only served to antagonize Juvia, who had started up a vengeful campaign in retaliation. Which wasn't fair, if you thought about it, since it was Juvia's fault that Erza was stuck in this situation to begin with.

Erza had gotten wet on more than one occasion, found various sabotages in her room, and lost one strawberry cake. The only reason Juvia was still breathing after the latter incident was that Erza hadn't been able to  _prove_ it was her.

It was enough to drive anyone mad.

Juvia stood abruptly and advanced, her practiced innocence replaced by the wrath lurking underneath. "Then  _maybe_ Erza-san should stop taking advantage of Gray-sama. She should not always be hanging on Gray-sama and trying to steal him from Juvia." She leaned forward, nostrils flaring. "She should remember that Gray-sama is  _not_ in love with her."

Erza growled low in the back of her throat. "I'm not taking advantage of anyone. I'm trying to do damage control on the mess  _you_ made. And will you stop acting like he's your property? Honestly. I think he's made it pretty clear that he's not in love with you, so stop stalking us everywhere and harassing us. Leave us alone." Her eyes narrowed dangerously. "And stay away from him."

Juvia had a lot of nerve to say shit like that when  _she_ was the one always harassing Gray and had  _drugged_ him. Gray should get a damn restraining order.

"How dare Erza-san?" Juvia shrieked.

She took a threatening step forward, magic sparking in the air around her, and Erza's lip curled in distaste. Bring it on.

Gajeel whistled loudly from the other side of the room. "Catfight!"

"Whoa, whoa, calm down!" Gray scrambled over, nearly tripping over his own feet in his haste. He stepped squarely between the girls and held out his arms to shoo them away from each other. "Okay, that's enough. Juvia, can I talk to you?"

"I can take care of myself," Erza snapped.

He offered her a strained smile. "I know, but this is as much my problem as yours."

He ushered Juvia out of the guild, already talking to her in a low voice. Erza scowled after them.

"Wow," Cana slurred from the bar. "Someone's jealous."

"You don't say," Erza muttered. "Even though she knows it's all about this stupid potion."

Cana cackled merrily. "I wasn't talking about her."

"What's  _that_  supposed to mean?"

Drunk people made no sense at all. Erza huffed to herself and made Natsu dry her off with his fire so that she wouldn't freeze.

"You and Gray have been getting on so well," Mira said cheerfully, perching on the edge of the table to grin at Erza. "It's no wonder she feels threatened."

"…He's drugged."

"Still. You guys fit together really well, that's all. It's like it was meant to be."

Erza closed her eyes and massaged her temples. "Must you all keep joking like that?"

"Who said I was joking?"

Erza opened her eyes just in time to see Mira slide off the table and walk away. Honestly, she didn't know what had gotten into everyone.

So yes, maybe she and Gray had gotten closer. They talked more and their not-dates were fun. But it was fake. Erza was only stuck because she couldn't convince him that he was drugged. She had brought it up on more than one occasion, but Gray's varied reactions of irritation, weariness, and sadness had made her stop.

"Erza?" Gray popped his head back into the building. "Wanna hang out? I want to build a snowman."

Erza flounced over without another word to anyone, still stewing but curious to know how things had gone.

"Where's Juvia?" she asked, pulling her scarf over the lower half of her face to protect it from the wind.

"Off sulking somewhere." Gray sighed and kicked his boots idly through the snow. "I tried not to upset her too much, but…she's persistent. If she's giving you trouble, you can let me know and I'll take care of it."

"I'm pretty sure I can handle Juvia."

"I know you can, but whoever brings the jealous suitor into the relationship is at least partly responsible for taking care of them."

He gave Erza a tired smile and she found herself laughing despite herself, and just like that they were back on solid footing. It was sweet of him to look out for her, even knowing that she was capable of holding her own.

They ended up by the river, where there were fields of snow to commandeer for their purposes. What started off as a snowman somehow turned into a snowcat, complete with twig whiskers and wings that Gray fashioned of ice and leaves.

Erza stepped back to admire their handiwork. "…I can't believe we just made Happy."

"Not Happy. It can be…Joy?"

The cold burned her throat as she burst out laughing. "Wow, how creative!"

"Yeah, yeah. Wanna build another?"

"Ugh, can we take a break?"

Gray snorted. "The indefatigable Erza, defeated by one measly snowcat?"

"It's cold," she complained, turning away from their creation to stare out at the icy river instead. After a moment, something heavy and warm settled on her shoulders and she looked up to see Gray draping his coat around her. "It's fine, Gray. You're going to freeze."

One corner of his mouth twitched upward. "This is barely even cold. That'll be a lot more useful to you than to me."

"…Thanks," Erza mumbled, pulling it tighter and hiding her smile beneath her scarf. They looked out at the river in quiet camaraderie for a few minutes before she said, "This place sure brings back memories."

"Oh yeah." Gray's face lit up. "I used to beat Natsu up here all the time! It was lots of fun."

She smacked him on the arm. "That's not what I meant."

He laughed. "I know, I know." His smile softened as his eyes traced over their river. "That's the day that changed everything."

Erza's heart sank as she wondered if the potion had really tampered with his memories that far back. "Don't tell me that was when you fell in… _love_?"

"Of course not," he said with a snort. "We were just kids. And I still kind of hated your guts. But  _something_ changed, right? We started getting along better and becoming friends and fitting into the guild."

"…Yeah. You're right."

Gray was silent for a long moment, and he didn't look over as he said, "You still love Jellal, right?"

Erza started, caught off guard. "W-what?"

"He was your first love, right? And you still love him."

"Y-yeah…" She fidgeted uncomfortably. Gray had never brought up Jellal before, and she had no idea where this might go when he still thought he was in love. "Kind of."

"It's okay." Gray smiled a little at the water. "When you love someone, you always keep them in your heart and you'll keep on loving them one way or another. And first loves are important. I know that. It's why I never said anything. I knew that you still loved him and you weren't ready for anything else. And yet…"

Erza cleared her throat awkwardly. "Gray, you really don't have to…" She trailed off, having no idea how to tackle this.

"It's okay. I stayed back because I wanted to see you happy. It's just… He hasn't come back. I've watched you wait and wait and wait for him, but he hasn't come back and you aren't happy."

He sighed and ran a hand through his hair. "I know I'd always be second best, and that's okay. Just… I know you're not ready, and I don't mind going slow. If it doesn't work out, it doesn't work out. If he comes back, he comes back. If you want to call it off, we call it off.

"But no matter what else, I'll wait for you. If you ever need me, if you ever change your mind, I'll be here."

The heat burned Erza's cheeks despite the cold. It was so  _Gray_. He had always been the friend she could count on, who was always there when she needed him.

And she was so humbled to have that, but she suddenly realized that she wished she could have it the way he was offering now too. That someone would love her enough to be so respectful of her boundaries and so patient with her when she needed time.

But she also had the unsettling feeling that things were going too far now. The longer Gray stayed under the spell, the deeper it went. And Erza feared that the deeper it went, the harder it would be to go back. As much as the potion had tampered with his memories, it was also sabotaging their friendship. When it was all over and Gray was faced with everything he'd been forced to say and do and feel, how hard would it be to laugh it off and go back to normal?

"Gray," Erza whispered, her voice thick, "you're no one's second best."

He finally looked over, and his mouth curled into a sly smile totally at odds with the prevailing mood. "You know what I'm definitely not second best at? Snowball fighting." And before Erza realized what was happening, a snowball slammed into her face and left her spluttering. "You might be able to beat me at everything else, but not that."

She stared at him as if he'd grown a second head. With how awkward he was with emotional things, it was a miracle he'd forced all of that out before abruptly changing gears. And most probably it was for her too, because he knew about her reluctance regarding all matters romantic.

And so, because this boy was her best friend and she owed him this much, she scooped up a handful of snow and tossed it back despite her troubled heart.

As it turned out, Gray wasn't exaggerating about how much better he was at snowball fighting. Erza's throws had a lot of power to them—even knocking off their snowcat's head, much to Gray's dismay—but Gray had grown up with the snow and was the undisputed champion.

Despite Erza's mood, she soon found herself laughing and having a good time. That seemed to happen a lot with Gray.

And then Gray stopped abruptly, a strange look passing over his face. Erza wasted no time taking advantage of the rare opportunity and threw a snowball. He staggered and toppled over backward.

Erza froze. Had she thrown it too hard? The thought of their decapitated snowcat flashed through her mind and she shuddered.

"Gray?"

She rushed over to his side. Luckily his head was still present, but his eyes were closed and shaking him had no immediate effect. The seconds dragged on stubbornly until Gray's eyes opened and he peered up at her groggily.

"Er…za?"

"Did you just pass out?" Erza pressed her hand to his forehand and grimaced at his scalding skin. She had assumed that his cheeks were pink from the cold, but he was burning up. "You're running a fever again. I thought I told you to tell me next time you weren't feeling well!"

"I wasn't…" Gray shook his head slowly and screwed his eyes shut. "I was fine… It just hit me all of a sudden. I don't know… Oh God, I feel awful."

"Headache?" Erza asked, fussing over him anxiously. "Fever? Dizziness?"

"…All of the above."

"Let's get you home."

Erza helped him up and staggered a little under his weight as they slowly made their way out of the park and back to his apartment. The heaviness on her heart was back now, weighing it down like a stone.

It was the potion again, it had to be. Maybe another reaction, but more likely… More likely, the effects were finally wearing off. It had been over a week and a half, and these were the same symptoms he'd shown shortly after getting dosed.

She was quiet as she hauled him home and tucked him safely into bed.

"You don't have to stay again," Gray rasped weakly, pulling the pillow over his head to block out the light.

"I'll stay," she said firmly, dragging up a chair.

She tried telling herself it was because she needed to make sure there would be no complications, but maybe it was simply because she didn't want to let him go.

When his breathing finally evened out, she pulled the pillow off his face and slipped it back beneath his head. His face was scrunched up in uneasy sleep again, and Erza brushed her fingers across his feverish forehead to push the stray hair out of his face.

"It'll be over soon," she said softly. "You'll be alright."

She was glad that soon their interactions would be wholly genuine again instead of tainted by the potion scrambling his brain. She was glad that things would be going back to normal.

She only hoped that their newfound closeness wouldn't dissipate entirely and that all the fun of their not-dates wouldn't be forgotten. Maybe they should hang out more. But she was glad that they'd be hanging out  _normally_ again.

"You know," she whispered to the dead air, "I think I'll miss this."

She was glad, so why was her heart still so heavy?

* * *

Erza woke to an empty bed again, the comforter wrapped snugly about her once more. Replacing the blanket, she wandered out to the kitchen to find Gray by the stove, making eggs.

"How are you feeling?" she asked.

"Oh, you're up. Good morning." He shrugged and smiled. "Fine. But that's the second time…" He shook his head and his smile curved into a frown. "If it keeps happening, I guess I'll have to suck it up and see Porlyusica."

Erza could bring up the potion again, but she decided not to stir up trouble. "If it happens again, I'll go with you," she said quietly. "Do you feel any…different?"

He gave her a funny look. "Not really? Just hungry. Want some eggs? Sorry, I should really learn how to cook something else."

So, still in 'love', then. Last time had happened nearly a day after the potion had taken effect, so maybe it could be up to a day before it wore off.

"It's alright. I'm not a good cook either."

Gray slid the eggs onto her plate and watched her somberly. "Why are you sad?"

"Huh? I'm not sad."

"You are. And when you're ready to talk about it, I'm here." He gave her a crooked grin. "But until then, I bet I can cheer you up. I'm going to take you ice skating today."

"Ice skating? I can't skate."

"That's okay, I'll teach you. I don't suppose you have skates that will still fit? No? Alright, we'll pick some up for you. Why don't you head home and change clothes and do whatever it is girls do in the morning, and I'll meet you at the guild in half an hour."

Erza nodded her agreement and headed home. She felt out of sorts, possibly because she'd spent all night sleeping in an uncomfortable chair, and got ready on autopilot before heading to the guild.

"It's finally wearing off, I think," she said, sliding onto the bench next to Lucy. "He got really sick again yesterday."

"Oh really?" Lucy smiled. "That's good. Not the sick part, but the wearing off part. You know."

"Yeah," said Erza. "Good."

"Great, Gray-sama will finally be free of Erza-san," Juvia said pointedly, despite the fact that she was several tables away and had no place in the conversation.

Erza ignored her. "We're going out today, and then… That's probably it."

"Sounds good," Natsu said. "I'm ready for all this weirdness to be over."

Mira swept over and handed Erza a glass of water, but her mouth was pressed into a thin line. "And here comes the fun part. He'll be a mess when he realizes what happened."

Erza sighed and sipped at the water. "I know."

"No," said Mira, "you don't. But it's nice that you at least try."

Before Erza had time to ask what she meant, Gray appeared in the doorway.

"Ready?" he asked.

Erza nodded and let Gray drag her around and make her try on skates until they found a satisfactory pair. He even insisted they stop by the bakery to get her some strawberry cake.

It was well after noon when they traipsed all the way out to the frozen lake, and they spent the rest of the afternoon there. Gray checked the ice and then did his best to help Erza with the basics of skating.

It turned out that Erza was a horrible skater. She was pretty sure that the human body wasn't meant to be supported by two thin metal blades. The constant falling could be frustrating, but Gray was surprisingly patient despite a few laughs and some gentle teasing.

They took a break to drink the cocoa he had brought in thermoses, and the warmth brought Erza back to life. Eventually, she even started getting the hang of it—although she was still horribly jealous of how effortlessly Gray could glide across the ice like he was just an extension of it.

"We ought to get you back," Gray said finally, looking up at the sky. "It gets dark so early now…"

Erza looked around at the waning light, and her gloved hands clenched into fists at her sides. "Just a little longer."

These could be the last moments they had before everything fell apart, and she wanted to drag them out for as long as possible. As much as she was ready for things to go back to normal, she would miss this. She wasn't ready to say goodbye just yet.

Gray hesitated, but then gave her a searching look and acquiesced. His skates scraped on the ice as he wound lazy circles around her, offering advice on her technique and catching her when she fell…or helping her back up, if he missed.

Even when thick darkness cloaked the sky, the ice reflected the pale brightness of the moon. It was getting harder to see and Erza was shivering in her coat, but the moonlight was enough and she wasn't ready to go.

Her foot twisted beneath her again, and Gray grabbed her to keep her upright. This time, he didn't let go.

"Erza, what's wrong?" he asked quietly, his earnest eyes searching her face.

"Nothing," she mumbled, looking away.

"You've been out of sorts all day. You don't have to do everything alone."

"I'm going to miss you, that's all," she whispered.

"Wait, what? Am I missing something here?"

Erza hunched in on herself. "I've had a lot of fun hanging out with you, and you're really sweet. I just don't… I don't want to go backwards."

They had gotten closer, but would that only push them farther away from where they had started? Maybe she was overreacting, but Gray's symptoms yesterday had brought his imminent freedom firmly to the forefront of Erza's mind and she couldn't help but worry. She had known him long enough to have a sense of when something would make him withdraw and shut down.

"Hey." Gray's hands cupped Erza's face gently and forced her to meet his eyes. His smile and eyes were soft. "I'm not going anywhere. And we've come too far to go backwards now."

"I… You… Gray, you and me…"

Gray's hands slid away to wrap around her. Leaning forward, he kissed her to silence her painful incoherency.

Erza stiffened in surprise, but her hands fisted against his chest. He was so gentle and it felt so  _good_  and it finally managed to silence the ugly cacophony of panicked thoughts running through her head.

And later, after her brain had cleared and she was no longer enveloped in his comforting embrace, she would realize that her worst mistake of the entire ordeal was kissing him back.

When he finally leaned back, Erza continued clutching him. His pale face was illuminated by the moonlight, dark eyes glittering softly, and it took her breath away. He brushed aside a strand of her hair and kept his hand cradling her face.

"Erza, will you go out with me?" he asked, his voice soft in the stillness of the night. "For real, this time."

_For real, this time_.

But it wasn't real.

Erza's eyes widened as she realized what she had just done.

"I can't."

She jerked back, away from his hand. Breaking free of the arm looped loosely around her waist, she spun and made for the edge of the lake as quickly as she could. She didn't make it far before tripping over her skates in her haste and crashing to the ice. Tears blurred her vision as she struggled to pull herself back to her feet.

For a long moment only the scrambling of her skates could be heard, but then the whisper of Gray's skates threaded underneath it. He glided across the ice and bent over to grasp Erza's elbow and tug her up gently. She pushed him off and headed blindly for the bank again, even though the ice disappeared behind a film of unshed tears.

"Sorry," Gray murmured. He grabbed her arm to steady her when she stumbled again, but released her immediately. "I overstepped the boundaries. I said that I wouldn't push you and that I'd wait until you were ready. I'm sorry, Erza."

"It's not–it's not your fault," she choked out, stumbling to the bank in a tangle of limbs to tug frantically at her skates and replace them with her boots. "I just… We can't do this right now."

If anything, it was  _her_ fault. She had grown complacent and let things go too far, because she was flattered by the attention and had become dependent on their newfound closeness. And maybe Juvia was right: she had been taking advantage of Gray.

"It's okay," Gray said. "I'll walk you home."

"But–"

"It's dark. Here, you're shivering."

He wrapped his coat around her again and stepped back. She blinked back her tears to stare at him uncomprehendingly. He was smiling. It was a little melancholy but mostly gentle, and she couldn't see any reproach or bitterness or resentment in his eyes. He had, as far as he knew, just gotten rejected, and yet…

Erza's vision blurred over again, and she swallowed hard past the lump in her throat. She hadn't realized what she was missing. One day, she hoped to find someone who would love her that much…without being drugged into it.

Gray jerked his head in a 'come on' motion and started walking, his small smile still in place. Erza stumbled after him, resolutely silent as she fought back both her tears and self-reproach.

She didn't know how she'd be able to face Gray again, once he realized what had happened. And she didn't know how he was going to handle this either, even if both of them knew it had been the direct result of a potion. As much as that first day of over-the-top affection had been a pain to deal with, Erza suddenly realized it was easier than this. That had been shallow and goofy and easy to write off. The deep, profound affection and closeness that came later would be so much harder to recover from.

"Goodnight, Erza," Gray said, stopping outside the dormitory.

"Goodnight," she mumbled back, not looking at him.

He sighed, the sound lingering in the darkness. "If you want, I can give you some space."

Erza's lips trembled. She was afraid that they'd be giving each other way too much space once he woke up, and it broke her heart.

She turned before she could stop herself, burying her face in his chest and fisting her hands in his shirt. "I don't want to lose you," she whispered, her body shaking as her tears finally broke free and slid down her cheeks. "You're my best friend, and I don't want anything to change that."

"Oh, Erza. I'm not going anywhere. I can do that. I can be that. I'll always be your friend, and I'll be here when you need me."

It wasn't fair how nice he was about it, and she couldn't blame the potion for that because she realized that he always was.

It wasn't until she'd left him standing in the snow and escaped to her room that she noticed she still had his coat. She could run back out and return it, but she didn't.

She huddled in his jacket and curled up on the chair by the window, watching his shadowy figure trudge away until it disappeared from view, the tears hot on her face and the phantom feeling of his lips tingling on hers.

* * *

"Are you alright?" Lucy asked. "Did something happen?"

"I'm fine, and nothing happened," Erza mumbled. She picked at a splinter on the table's edge with her thumbnail to avoid eye contact.

"Okay… Has the potion worn off yet?"

"Not as of last night."

Erza wasn't in the mood to chat. She didn't know how things were going to go with Gray after last night, and it was making her nervous. And as the hours dragged on and Gray still didn't appear, her anxiety only grew.

It was well after noon by the time Gray opened the door. His shoulders were hunched and he walked with a strange stiffness, as if vibrating with tension. His gaze hesitated on Erza for the briefest of seconds before jumping straight to Juvia, and it was enough for her to know without a doubt that the potion was a thing of the past.

"Juvia," he said, his voice deceptively low and flat, "what did you do? Another love potion? Really?"

Juvia smiled brightly. "Gray-sama is free of Erza-san!"

Gray's eyes narrowed suddenly and his mouth twisted into a scowl. "How  _dare_  you?" he demanded, the anger finally seeping into his voice. " _You_ are a scheming, manipulative, selfish  _bitch_."

Erza sucked in a breath. She'd never heard Gray be so cruel to one of his friends before. And although Juvia definitely deserved a piece of his mind… They might have underestimated how upset he would be.

Juvia flinched back, her eyes widening. "G-Gray-sama–"

"Don't you 'Gray-sama' me," he snarled. "How dare you  _drug_ me and tamper with my feelings like that? You really think it's okay to take away my free will for your entertainment? You are so  _selfish_. You have  _no right_ to try breaking me and twisting me around to get what you want."

The guild was dead silent aside from Gray's fury and Juvia's sniffling, everyone stunned but unable to interfere.

Juvia's eyes filled with tears. "Juvia just wanted Gray-sama to love her and give her a chance. She doesn't know what went wrong, but–"

"Oh, so it would have been better if you drugged me into loving  _you_?" Gray asked mockingly. His dark eyes glittered with disdain, harder than Erza had ever seen them. "Because that's  _so_  much better. And nothing went wrong with the potion, you stupid girl. It worked exactly like it was supposed to."

"B-but–"

"You really don't know, do you?" Gray laughed bitterly and shook his head. "You have no idea what you're drugging me with.  _I_ only know because I did research on those stupid potions after the last half-dozen times you tried it. That potion obviously had an exclusivity and amplification clause built into it."

"Juvia does not understand…"

"The more ethical of your black market potion dealers—not that there's  _any_ such thing as an ethical love potion—build in a magic clause so that you can't tamper with love that's already there. If your victim already loves someone else, it works by exaggerating existing feelings instead of transferring them to you. And if you knew anything about what you were poisoning me with or, in fact, knew anything about me at all, you would have realized it wouldn't work."

Erza's heart stopped for a long, painful moment. What was he saying?

"But Juvia loves Gray-sama," Juvia wailed. "She just–"

"No, you don't," Gray snapped. "You only love yourself. You only think about yourself. If you loved me, you wouldn't try to mess with my feelings and heart and mind and relationships and generally turn me into someone else. You only care about getting what you want.

"You stalk me and harass me and drug me and refuse to leave me alone  _even after I've told you I'm not interested_. You're so fucking creepy, Juvia. Seriously. If I picked a random girl to constantly stalk and create some creepy doll shrine to in my apartment, everyone would label me a psycho freak. But of course it's fine for  _you_ to do it to  _me_.

"I'm done. You need to stop." He leaned forward, his eyes like shards of ice. "And if you  _ever_ try drugging me again, I swear that I will never speak to you again."

Juvia's mouth opened and closed helplessly, and she burst into tears. Gray turned on his heel and looked at a point just to the left of Erza's face.

"I apologize for my inappropriate behavior," he said tightly. "It won't happen again. And I apologize on Juvia's behalf as well, since she doesn't seem to see anything wrong with this."

Erza opened her mouth, but the only thing that came out was a strangled, "G-Gray…"

Gray spun around and stalked back out of the guild, head down and shoulders hunched. Erza stared after him, her mind reeling.

"Damn," Cana said. "I knew he'd be mad, but…"

"I thought we already talked about what a bad idea these love potions were," Gajeel said gruffly, patting a weeping Juvia on the back in an awkward fashion.

"Wait, wait," Lucy interrupted. "Aside from the total meltdown… Is it just me, or did he say that he really was in love with Erza?"

The whole guild seemed to exchange one long look, and Erza's face twisted into an odd expression.

"Really," Mira said impatiently, "am I the  _only_ one who's realized that he's been in love with her for years?"

Erza stared at her. "W-what?"

"Gosh, you can be so dense," Mira grumbled. She swiped a cloth angrily at a glass in a halfhearted attempt to dry it. "We spent a lot of time together after Lisanna… He's never said anything, but it's obvious if you pay attention. And I might not have been your rival for a while, but I can still read you. You're just as deep as he is, even if you still can't admit it to yourself.

"Well, this is do-or-die, dear. It's up to you to decide if you're ready to let go of Jellal and go for it. Gray's a sweetheart and you could do a lot worse, but that's your choice." Her eyes hardened as they bored into Erza, and suddenly Erza could see a glimpse of that hard-edged girl who had once been her rival. "But you'd better decide now. You know how he is. He's going to shut down after this. If you want it, then you'd better go get him. Or you're going to lose your chance."

Erza couldn't breathe with everyone's eyes on her and Mira staring her down and Juvia sobbing in the corner. "I-I–"

She spun around before she even realized what she was doing, her hair whipping around behind her as she raced out of the guild. "Gray! Gray, wait!"

She looked frantically up and down the street, but Gray was nowhere to be seen. Cursing under her breath, she pushed her way through the crowds. She had no idea how to handle the situation once she found him, but she knew that she couldn't let him go.

Several minutes of searching saw her come up emptyhanded, and she wanted to cry in frustration.

_The river._

Of course. She whirled about and raced for the river. Sure enough, she spotted him standing on the bank and looking out at the water grimly.

"Gray!"

He didn't look over. "What do you want?" he asked shortly.

He was still mad, which was understandable. But Erza could sense the difference. He had been on the offensive before, with Juvia, but now he was on the defensive. He didn't know what to do any more than she did…and he was afraid of getting hurt.

Erza stopped beside him, pausing to catch her breath and figure out what to say. It didn't help her come up with anything.

"I just…wanted to make sure you were alright."

"Fine," Gray said tersely.

"I'm…sorry. I know that some things happened and–"

"I already apologized. Look, I'm sorry that I made you uncomfortable and whatever. I can give you some space, if you want."

No, Erza did not want.

"You said that you'd always be here for me," she said, lifting her chin as if it could hide the tears gathering in the corners of her eyes. "You said that you'd still be my friend no matter what and I wouldn't lose you. You meant it, didn't you?"

He deflated, the furious tension in his body draining away. "Of course," he said tiredly, his shoulders slumping. "Whatever you want."

Erza chewed on her bottom lip and searched for answers in his face. "And did you mean it that…you really…love me?"

Gray closed his eyes. "…Yes."

"So…it  _wasn't_ all fake, then."

"I wouldn't have necessarily expressed myself like that if I had control over myself, but…" He shook his head and sighed. Erza had never heard a more world-weary sound. "We can just wipe the slate clean and ignore this little incident."

Erza took a deep breath and forced the words out before she lost her nerve. "Kiss me."

"What?"  _Now_ he was finally looking at her, lips parted in surprise and eyes shining with confusion.

"I want to know what it feels like when I know it's real."

"You…" Gray trailed off and shook his head helplessly, looking suddenly small and lost.

"You said you'd wait for me until I was ready." Erza bunched her hands in her skirts, her face set in grim determination. "I want to go on jobs and spend all your money on strawberry cake and go to a festival where no one passes out and build an army of snowcats with stupid names and get my ass kicked in snowball fights and learn how to ice skate properly and go on real date-dates…with you.

"I'm ready. Will you go out with me? For real, this time."

She lifted her chin and scowled at him defiantly, her fingers going numb from how tightly they were clenched at her sides. Gray stared at her, eyes wide and mouth half open. Then a low chuckle rumbled through his chest and he shook his head again.

"You are one strange woman."

"H-hey!"

He stepped forward, and Erza's protests caught in her throat as she forgot how to breathe. Gray wrapped an arm snugly around her waist to pull her close, and his other hand tangled in her hair.

"Reminds me of why I fell in love with you," he murmured, his breath tickling her ear.

He kissed her, and it was just as good as she remembered. But this time there wasn't the guilt that came after or the insecurity. And so she kissed him back, and then again.

And then the sky opened up and heavy curtains of rain poured down on them. Gray coughed out a surprised curse and molded an icy umbrella to hold over their heads.

"Guess I should take care of that," he said unenthusiastically.

"Yeah…but make sure you tell her to keep her grubby hands off you."

Gray chuckled. "Knew you were jealous."

"Am not!"

"I'll do it later…once I've calmed down and won't just yell some more."

Erza hummed her agreement and snuggled into his side. She was content with them standing side by side in their little circle of safety, watching the rain fall all around them.

"It was all true, you know," he mumbled. "I wouldn't have had the guts to say any of it to you without that stupid potion, but…I meant all of it."

Erza smiled and ducked her head. "I love you too."

His arm tightened around her waist and she leaned her head against his shoulder.

It felt good and it felt  _real_ , and that was all Erza could have asked for.

* * *

.

* * *

Gray trudged through the mud, his spirits only lowering as he spotted a blur of blue through the cascading sheets of rain.

"Here goes nothing," he muttered to himself, the words lost in the pounding of the rain on the ice umbrella.

Sliding onto the bench next to Juvia, he scooted close enough that the umbrella would cover them both. Honestly, she was going to make herself sick if she kept sitting out in the rain unprotected. It had already been raining for days.

"G-Gray-sama!" Juvia's head jerked around and she stared at him with wide eyes.

He sighed. "I'm sorry I yelled at you. What you did is definitely messed up, don't get me wrong, but I shouldn't have been such a jerk."

Juvia looked down at her hands folded in her lap, her wet hair falling forward to hide her face. "Juvia…also apologizes. She did not mean to hurt Gray-sama."

"I know. It's okay."

It wasn't okay, not really, but he could appreciate that she was self-absorbed and selfish rather than intentionally malicious. It was time to move on from it, and he didn't like leaving things so messy between them.

"So…Gray-sama and Erza-san…?"

"Yeah. I'd…really appreciate it if you could stop following me everywhere and harassing Erza. Just…could you back off a little? And I was serious about no more potions."

He wondered if that was too much to ask at once, but he really needed to shore up the boundaries. Maybe she'd even go along with them eventually.

"Juvia will try," Juvia mumbled. "She won't interfere with Gray-sama and Erza-san's relationship anymore."

"Thanks. I appreciate that."

Juvia was quiet for a moment, but then said in a small voice, "Juvia really does love Gray-sama. Why…why does Gray-sama not love her back?"

Gray smiled a little sadly and looked out at the rain. "Lyon is head over heels for you. Why don't you love him back?" He sighed and leaned back. "Sometimes things just don't work out. You can't force love, Juvia. Not even with potions. I can't force myself to fall in love with you any more than you could force yourself to fall in love with Lyon or out of love with me."

"Juvia…sees."

As much as Gray couldn't stand her incessant harassment, he could sympathize a little. He'd been locked in an unrequited love for a long time and knew how hard it was. He didn't approve of how Juvia handled things, but he couldn't help but feel for her.

"Hey, it'll be alright." He tipped his head and gave her a smile. "I'd like to be your friend. What do you say we give up our awkward chase-and-run antics and be friends instead?"

Juvia's lips trembled, but she lifted her chin. "Okay. Juvia…would like to be Gray-sama's friend."

"Thank you." Gray's smile softened a little. "If you ever need anything…you can come to me, alright?"

"Juvia appreciates that," she mumbled, swiping her sleeve across her eyes.

"And when the rain stops, come hang out at the guild again. We miss you."

Gray slipped the handle of the icy umbrella into Juvia's hand and closed her fingers around it gently. She looked at him with tear-filled eyes and sniffled. Maybe she was going to say something, but he didn't wait for her to find the words.

He stood and walked away, shoving his hands in his pockets and letting the rain soak into his skin. The rain matched his mood. Dealing with Juvia dragged his spirits down, partly because it was a big mess and partly because she was hurt and he couldn't fix it. But it was a start, maybe, to them becoming real friends. They'd just have to see how it went.

It was all rather depressing.

But then he spotted a blur of red through the gray sheets of rain, washing his problems from his mind, and a smile broke out on his face.

**Author's Note:**

> Remember, kids, non-consensual mind-altering drugs are not okay. And if love potions existed and someone fed you one, they prooobably don't really love you lol It's not cute or romantic to drug someone :P


End file.
